I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
