His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize