Me. At least after what I've been through.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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