i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Randomize
