Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
