Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
