just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
