we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize