It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize