I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Can I color on your dick again?
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
