I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm at about main and main street
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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