He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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