Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
