ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
