watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I'm passing your future prison.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
