I'm lost and stupid without you.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
