she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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