i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
