just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
