i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
