I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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