she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
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