Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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