i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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