I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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