"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
