Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
