I'm drive I can fine osifer
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
