HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
why is half of my head shaved?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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