Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
is this the sara with the beer cane?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
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