Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
