Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
