I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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