That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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