would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
