I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize