So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
My vagina is very pro this idea
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
