I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
