i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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