i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
