I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
