You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
