i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I party with great urgency now.
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