No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
