so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
