drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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