Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
even my farts smell like vagina
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I can't turn off my feet"
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
