You can't motorboat a personality
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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