So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
