A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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