Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
